je pense je suis malade!

but i'm not sure. i don't know. it's 6:40 AM and i've been up for... almost 2 hours. i think i got maybe an hour of sleep tonight. i don't know why. it was really weird. lately i've been dreaming that there's someone in the room and i'll wake up talking to them. most of the time i think they're on top of my mini fridge. one night i dreamed it was this SAE greg, who i met briefly this summer and came to find out that he's my friend cody's ex and works at hibbets (i bought shoes there, and talked to him). not like i ever really knew him, but he ended up on my mini fridge. tonight i dreamed it was my friend sarah's younger brother, bob/by, who's my age. i met him the other day and didn't pay attention, but met him again tonight when i went to watch gilmore girls over at her house (she lives at home with her parents and her brother and her younger sister, who's still in high school, i think). and lo and behold, i paid attention tonight. so i guess that's why he turned up on my mini fridge.


other than that... i have so much to do for class. i have to get over to the library to watch jane eyre. i have to read jany eyre. i have to learn all the anglo-saxon pronouns and their cases and all that crap by thursday. i have to learn the history of the english language up to the norman conquest by thursday. i wouldn't mind the anglo-saxon pronouns, except we got them yesterday. and we have to have them memorized by thursday. that's a little quick. i'm not sure if you know anything about anglo-saxon, but it's an incredibly complicated language (not complared to latvian or anything, but still). it's got like...5 cases, 3 genders, blah blah blah. anyways, yeah. it's cool though. but that on top of work on top of lack of sleep... ist nicht gut! but i did get up and start an essay on the mutilation of the english language. i've had about enough of it, living in the ghetto/ country as i do. we be sickinin of it. especially after learning what we COULD be speaking, if not for the norman conquest of 1066. they may have screwed up our spelling, but at least they made the a-ses simplify the language. (a-ses refers to the anglo-saxons, not a cuss word i'm bleeping out. i don't bother with that.)

so. i'm gonna read. and study. and read. and speak some anglo-saxon. it's a wonderful class, hist of eng is, but it's a 4521/5521 class... which is a little advanced for me, i think. it'll be a challenge.

MY FAMILY IS COMING TO TENNESSEE THIS WEEKEND! i'm so excited :D

love
lindsey.

fete again!

chicks and hicks rocked... the lake rocked that day... sunday was nice and chill... i got paid, it wasn't that great, but oh well...but mostly, chicks and hicks rocked... i'm just dealing with the aftermath right now. hopefully it won't be too bad ;D

love
lindsey.

gouter

so my little issue is not yet resolved, but i've put it on a backburner for now. i did really badly on a german country and people test and i'm bummed out about that. i'm going to have to work my butt off for that class, i think. and it was supposed to be easy. dang it.

working again tonight... the other night was SO much fun when i closed with chris and annie... we put on pinkerton really really loud and danced around and crap. i love the people i work with... they're all so sweet. i'm excited b/c tonight i'm working with cody for a while, and i absolutely ADORE her. she's fun times!

do'nt know what i'm going to be doing tonight after work... get off at 10 and all, so i'll have some time to go out if i want. i've been really tired though, so i might just go to bed.

friday night there are a couple of parties going on... the beta in my hist. eng. class invited me to their party, and i think there's a pike party too... idk. i'm going to the lake saturday with cody and then that night is hicks and chicks at the sigmachi house, so i may not go out friday night... save it all for saturday!

errrrr... yeah. it's just been a weird week. i haven't felt very well all week, but i haven't been sick enough to call it being sick, so i've just been off-kilter.

i think i'm gonna take a nap before meth and res.

oooh- jason, can we still get married if i'm not there? can we exchange vows over facebook or something? i'm ready to be married to you ;D

is cat still alive? darling love, call me!

love
lindsey.

encore

so again i've gotten my hopes up and nothing. yeah. boys are no fun sometimes. it's so NOT WORTH IT RIGHT NOW.

gaaaahhhhhhhhh....

love
lindsey.

bizarre!

so i went to work the other day and a girl came in to work that i hadn't met before. we introduced ourselves and i recognized her name as one the sigma chi's had asked me about. so we talked about them briefly. then later, she came over and asked where i was from, because my name sounded really familiar. here's our convo:

me: i'm from birmingham

her: did you ever play volleyball?

me: in 7th grade...

her: i played in huntsville, for grissom! from like 6th grade till 10th! then i moved here.

me: that's crazy! did you go to church anywhere in huntsville?

her: aldersgate.

me: was mitchell williams your pastor?

her :yeah!

me: he went there after he our church!

her: wow!

me: so where are you from?

her: sparta...it's a really small town...

me: i know where that is; my grandparents live in rock island, so it's close to sparta

her: MY grandparents live in rock island!

me: oh my gosh. you know where the island is? that's my grandparents place right there

her: wow. you know the old foglight? that's where my grandparents live.

me: do they hang out at the market ever? i bet our grandparents are friends!

her: yeah! that's so crazy!

so yeah. that's my new friend cody. we worked together friday, and then saturday she invited me to the lake (rock island!) with some of her friends, so i went, and we had an AWESOME time. and last night we hung out after i got off work, and she's really sweet. i like her a lot. and she's not greek! she's not in a sorority, just like me! so that's great. so i'm really excited to have another good friend around. hoorah!

going to work again. i've worked friday, saturday, and now sunday. and this coming week, i only work 8 hours. what's up with that?! crazy.

love
lindsey.

garcons

i think the reason i don't have a boyfriend is because i really don't want one. i just don't like the emotional issues that come with it.

i think i've realized that for good tonight. i just don't want to spend time dealing with all that crap. can't we just take things in a more relaxed manner and be all laissez-faire about it? does it really have to be such a huge deal? my heavens.

love
lindsey.

mes amis

ok. so the past few days... well, yesterday and today, i've gotten to talk to anna, kelsey, AND jason. and that's so exciting for me. i miss them so much. anna, because she's insane and i can't believe some of the things she told daniel, but i'm super proud of her for it. i miss kelsey because she's so patient and calm and i love her and she's my sister. and i miss jason because he's such a good friend and he's always got something nice and honest to say to me when i'm most depressed and when i'm not depressed he STILL makes me happier.

so it's been a great time of catching up.

i've been spending more time with april. i really like that gal a lot too. i wish shaina was on the meal plan so i could eat with her. that's my most sociable time, when i eat.

i've had so much reading to do though! i can barely keep up with it. and it's only the beginning... no, i think it'll get better, because most of it is just what i have to do initially for english meth and res. so that'll be done soon. as long at brit lit doesn't speed up too much we should be ok. we'll see. but i've been rather busy with that, and on top of work, i'm pleasantly occupied most of the time. i need to start fitting the gym in more, but today was just really busy. and i work tomorrow. so thursday then. ah well ;D

love
lindsey.

qu'est-que tu pense je suis? eh?

i don't know where my faithful readers are, but... umm... i feel like updating. i've got some down time before work at 1. not much, but a little.

this weekend has been a heck of a lot of fun. i went into it thinking i wouldn't see the sigma chis at ALL, because this is phase one (or at least is trying to be phase one) of get lindsey on the right track, so i was going to cut down on time spent there (because i spend a LOT of time there, and as nice as they are, i know we all need a break from people once in a while), and i was going to go to the gym more (so i can finally finish losing weight and buy some new clothes!) and i was going to work more and get all my homework done (to be rich and successful). but i haven't really gotten off to a good start on that. so TUESDAY will be day 1 of Operation On Track. we'll track my progress and see how it goes!

it's more than i just don't want to be over at the house all the time. i'll be oddly frank and honest here, and hope kelsey doesn't read this one, because i just don't want her to. but anyways. yall know how i am about wanting to be wanted. and you know how i need to hear it. friday night was so nice because they called and picked me up and everything. it was unusual. and last night i got invited twice to the KD's black and white party. and really lucas and jackson said some very sweet things to me that mean a whole lot more than they probably think they ever would (mostly something to the effect of 'i like lindsey.' and that's about it, but still. you know how i am). it's just that i'm continually worried that what i do one night will forever label me an enemy of the frat or something. i just need to know where i STAND with them. i need some sort of sign that i'm missed or whatever, which is also part of the plan, in that i will not be around as much until my goals are all accomplished, and so the day when one person (not jenkins, he doesn't count, because he's too good of a friend... there might be one or two other exceptions) but the day when one guy that i don't know ALL that well mentions something about me not being around, then i know i can go back. until then, however... gym and homework. gym and homework. or hanging out with girl friends. and that's IT. and I WILL STICK WITH IT AND I WILL BE A SIZE FOUR SOON AND I WILL GET TO GO SHOPPING! heck yeah.

and who knows. maybe when i'm skinny again, i can model some more and get RICH. go to nashville or something. wouldn't that be exciting? indeed!

so here goes!

love
lindsey.

je comprends

ok. so i've tried EVERYTHING to get to sleep, but nothing's working. it's insane. so i've decided, why not update, eh?

classes were fine today. my english method and research class was INCREDIBLY boring... we learned that books can be found in a library, and we also learned about the different parts of a research paper.. ie intro, outline, body, citations, works cited, etc. yeah.

work was fine, i enjoyed it again, and got a chocolate milkshake free. i'm seriously going to have to watch my weight there.

so i had a bit of a bitter disappointment today, but i get the hint. MESSAGE RECEIVED, KIDDOS. tomorrow i'm hitting the campus with full on lindsey self confidence and taking it by storm. i'm not going to eat with people i know, because i don't want to use them as a crutch. and they aren't too big on introducing me to people anyways, so i'm going to take matters into my own hands and this is IT, i have ARRIVED. tomorrow beings the tour de lindsey. anna, cat, you know how i strut sometimes, and just exude lindseyness? this is going to be it. i've realized that i haven't really been completely myself around the sigma chis this summer, so i need to separate and regroup. i'm more outgoing than they probably think i am. i'm certainly funnier and wittier and not nearly as dorky. so i need to just gather myself about me for a garralous outbreak or something. it's like lindsey ebola. i don't know. i'm rambling. at any rate, that's what's going on, so any calls tomorrow during the day to say hello and boost my self confidence levels even more would be GREATLY appreciate. between the hours of 10 and 2, please, preferably, but anytime after 10 if you can't make it before 2. those are just going to be my most sociable hours.

righto then.

OFF TO PREPARE THE WEAPONRY (and by weaponry, i mean that gorgeous visage i was so famous for in birmingham. that's right. i'm going tittup tomorrow! ;D )

love
lindsey.